I cracked like an egg

I tried
I tried hard
Really hard
And I’m still trying
Really hard
But look at you
And I do
Like glue
I’m stuck
I want to get free
Yet I want us to be
You’re not really poison
But you’re not really meds
You’re not really sensible
Or healthy
For me
Or for you
But something about
Where we’ve been
An age ago
Or a month
Or three
Is like a moth
And a light
Banging its head
Banging together
Oh god banging together
And I can’t let it go
I don’t let it go
Something about
The smile
The face
The fact that you’re broken
That I was broken
One of us was a lightbulb
And one was a moth
And now
Now that I know
You’re not good for me
And yet
I still
Can’t let it go
Because you could be
If all the stars aligned
And you were strong
And healthy
And right
Subconscious is stronger
Than discipline and rules
I’m digging like a doozer
Into the whys and why nots
Of emotional conditioning
Of the haves and have nots
If I could write the rules
If I could change your mind
I’d make us work
I’d make us
I’m way past the point
Of all of the whys
Of all the why nots
The human mind
Is a fuckhole of a mess
When it’s not quite right
And it can’t address
I wish you’d make sense
I wish you could see
Whatever made you scared
All the years ago


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s